As wedding photographers, what legitimacy do we have to comment on what is the perfect wedding gift… NONE! But i have been married and i know for sure what we enjoyed and what we didn’t enjoy as much….
Personally I think the days of buying newly married couples toasters, towels and bath mats are long gone. If you are considering anything such as this for your friends wedding then i urge you to have a rethink!
Perhaps in our modern society couples are living together before the wedding, apposed to waiting for the marriage. So these once handy tools and paraphernalia for a new home would come in extremely useful back in the day, but everyone does have Amazon Prime now and towels are boring!
It’s not uncommon for couples to put on their wedding invites that they prefer cold hard cash. I know we did, and most people complied!
There is a worry that asking for cash might be a little forward, a little cheeky, a little rude, but its not uncommon and i know from personal experience of being a groom and a guest at weddings, i dont mind.
From the couples point of view its much better to get the cash, if you are going on a honeymoon then there is the spending money. If you have a photographer to pay a remaining balance to they ALWAYS love cash, or you can buy towels that you want for your own home etc etc.
So money is the way forward, but how much should you give….? Now this is going to be different in every circumstance, and people’s status will vary. However, i would suggest that you should try and cover the cost of your meal, per head within your party. So if you and your wife have been invited, donate what you feel two meals at their venue would cost. Wedding breakfasts cost between £50 and £100 per head on average.
Now some guests dont give you a bean, not even a card, but what can you do about this…? Invoice them post wedding for their costs! No that would be ridiculous. Just don’t invite them to your next wedding is my suggestion.
There is an alternative to dirty sexy money however, why not create a gift that comes from the heart! Recently at a wedding, one of the brides aides hand made a guest book, then supplied a Polaroid camera and ensured everyone had their photo taken and signed the handmade book.
It was a lovely touch and something i am sure the bride and groom will cherish forever.
A friend recently got married and myself and my wife, along with another couple chipped in and bought the bride and groom a Go Pro Camera kit with some accessories for them to use on their Honeymoon. This is something we knew they wanted, therefore wasn’t as risky as a toaster.
My final suggestion would be to help pay for something towards the couples wedding. We often have best men, parents and guests calling up to book photo booths, Candy Carts, wedding cars etc as gifts to the couple. Now this will take some co ordination with the couple as you would need their blessing before introducing anything to their big day!
So there we have it! Money is the safest option, but there are alternatives, just please dont buy any useless crap from TJ’s but above all make sure you make the effort and give something as a gesture.